Trust is a funny thing. It’s probably the thing most taken for granted by people, especially in today’s society, with information so easily at our fingertips. Some feel that trust should be earned before it is given at all, but the problem with that thought is that it is SO hard to earn in the first place.
You can probably think of more than one time that a person has lost your trust, but thinking of times when someone has earned it is much more difficult. Trust is generally earned over a long period of time with consistent results and obvious actions on their intentions. In an ongoing relationship, like a marriage, this can be difficult because day to day life is on auto-pilot. Your spouse consistently provides the same results (earning a paycheck, doing the dishes) without you even realizing it. When it comes to intentions, it’s a matter of communication. A lack of good communication in any relationship can mean a gradual breaking down of trust. And we all know how a single simple event can completely break down trust in one swoop.
So how do you earn/gain trust? Proper communication on a daily basis is key to rebuilding trust. Since trust in relationships is a two-way street, both parties need to be working at it. It doesn’t matter how hard you are trying to earn trust, if the other person involved isn’t actively trying to trust you. Communicate! Don’t break your word, and don’t intentionally lie. Don’t assume things either. Talk about everything till your blue in the face. Being obviously open, shows the other party that you are actively trying to have good intentions with common expectations. It’s a daily task that is well worth the effort.
Take your steps toward rebuilding trust today and everyday by communicating your intentions and making sure that you both have the same expectations. And when you hit a bump in the road, communicate some more, ask for forgiveness, and be willing to start over again. Any real relationship is worth the work- from both sides of the relationship.